Advice for family member issues during Covid-19

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Thank you all so much for your support last night and this morning. I’m so sorry I took over the thread.

I’ve not spoken to my son today, I’m lying low and resting today as I’ve felt unwell since I woke up from all the stress flaring the CFS symptoms. He’s stormed out this morning and told my husband he did nothing wrong and he’s the one being picked on at home. There’s no getting through to him he’s the one causing the stress when the rest of us are being kind; keeping eachothers spirits up and he’s not on the same page as us in terms of keeping safe. My husband has said he will be having a talk with him tonight as we can’t carry on living like this. He either sticks to our rules to keep us all safe or he will have to move out. We can’t be living with this level of stress and abuse from him anymore. We can’t let him go where he likes and live like he did pre covid and he has to accept the time we’re in. He can’t keep being in denial. I said to him yesterday, it's far easier to be kind to eachother and support eachother through what already is a very stressful time, than to make life harder for each other and cause additional stress that no one needs. He had nothing to say to that.

I’m now going silent with him, I feel terrible as a mum doing that but I can’t keep brushing his behaviour under the carpet. He tries to act all nice the day after an outburst to then do it again within a few days.

Thank you all so much xx
 
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He sounds like a very angry young man and I hope he can also get the support he needs.
He’s usually such a kind boy, a tad fiery a times but a lovely caring son. It’s the last 2 months he’s just so angry once out of lockdown he had to be careful. We thought he would be happy once able to go out and about but that’s when he became angry and in his words ‘I want more’. I’m trying so hard to support him and my other 2 children but he’s so angry and lashes out because he just wants to live normally. So we are seen as the bad parents restricting his life, not covid.
 
Thank you all so much for your support last night and this morning. I’m so sorry I took over the thread.

I’ve not spoken to my son today, I’m lying low and resting today as I’ve felt unwell since I woke up from all the stress flaring the CFS symptoms. He’s stormed out this morning and told my husband he did nothing wrong and he’s the one being picked on at home. There’s no getting through to him he’s the one causing the stress when the rest of us are being kind; keeping eachothers spirits up and he’s not on the same page as us in terms of keeping safe. My husband has said he will be having a talk with him tonight as we can’t carry on living like this. He either sticks to our rules to keep us all safe or he will have to move out. We can’t be living with this level of stress and abuse from him anymore. We can’t let him go where he likes and live like he did pre covid and he has to accept the time we’re in. He can’t keep being in denial. I said to him yesterday, it's far easier to be kind to eachother and support eachother through what already is a very stressful time, than to make life harder for each other and cause additional stress that no one needs. He had nothing to say to that.

I’m now going silent with him, I feel terrible as a mum doing that but I can’t keep brushing his behaviour under the carpet. He tries to act all nice the day after an outburst to then do it again within a few days.

Thank you all so much xx
I understand you have health issues and want to keep you and your family safe, but it sounds like your son is struggling a lot. His mental health will be affected and depression kills. Maybe see if he would consider seeing a doctor or councillor so he can talk to them about his feelings. Things cannot be easy on the younger generation, he should be approaching adulthood and being able to make his own decisions and while all the restrictions are in place with the pandemic his life may feel out of control and a little pointless if he cannot do anything or see any friends. Hope your health improves 💕
 
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Thank you all so much for your support last night and this morning. I’m so sorry I took over the thread.

I’ve not spoken to my son today, I’m lying low and resting today as I’ve felt unwell since I woke up from all the stress flaring the CFS symptoms. He’s stormed out this morning and told my husband he did nothing wrong and he’s the one being picked on at home. There’s no getting through to him he’s the one causing the stress when the rest of us are being kind; keeping eachothers spirits up and he’s not on the same page as us in terms of keeping safe. My husband has said he will be having a talk with him tonight as we can’t carry on living like this. He either sticks to our rules to keep us all safe or he will have to move out. We can’t be living with this level of stress and abuse from him anymore. We can’t let him go where he likes and live like he did pre covid and he has to accept the time we’re in. He can’t keep being in denial. I said to him yesterday, it's far easier to be kind to eachother and support eachother through what already is a very stressful time, than to make life harder for each other and cause additional stress that no one needs. He had nothing to say to that.

I’m now going silent with him, I feel terrible as a mum doing that but I can’t keep brushing his behaviour under the carpet. He tries to act all nice the day after an outburst to then do it again within a few days.

Thank you all so much xx
you’re not a terrible mum! Sometimes you do just have to be cruel to be kind not just for him but for all of you! He’s 18, he can legally vote, drink, join the army etc. Unfortunately it might end up in him leaving but that might be the best thing for all of you! My friend had a really argumentative relationship with her mum and dad, as soon as she moved out things got so much better and now they’re so close, she voluntarily goes to visit and they go out together when before she moved out, she stated once she left she’d never go back to see them. All is not lost xx
 
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you’re not a terrible mum! Sometimes you do just have to be cruel to be kind not just for him but for all of you! He’s 18, he can legally vote, drink, join the army etc. Unfortunately it might end up in him leaving but that might be the best thing for all of you! My friend had a really argumentative relationship with her mum and dad, as soon as she moved out things got so much better and now they’re so close, she voluntarily goes to visit and they go out together when before she moved out, she stated once she left she’d never go back to see them. All is not lost xx
Thank you so much for your kind words. You’re right. I just want my lovely kind son back. Covid has destroyed our relationship 😢 xxx
 
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Thank you so much for your kind words. You’re right. I just want my lovely kind son back. Covid has destroyed our relationship 😢 xxx
what will be will be but right now you need to focus on your and your other kids! This isn’t good for any of you especially not your health! I wish you all the best❤
 
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I understand you have health issues and want to keep you and your family safe, but it sounds like your son is struggling a lot. His mental health will be affected and depression kills. Maybe see if he would consider seeing a doctor or councillor so he can talk to them about his feelings. Things cannot be easy on the younger generation, he should be approaching adulthood and being able to make his own decisions and while all the restrictions are in place with the pandemic his life may feel out of control and a little pointless if he cannot do anything or see any friends. Hope your health improves 💕
Thank you. I fear this every day and that why I don’t keep him locked up. He does see friends. They go for bbq in friends gardens, he meets his girlfriend, he’s been to Chester zoo with his girlfriend, he has driving lessons once a week and he is allowed to go into shops in our local town. I have given a lot of leeway to make sure that his mental health is okay. The things that we aren’t allowing is him going into his friends cars, multiple friends households, and having friends over at our home. All his friends including his girlfriend mix with a wide range of people so we don’t want to take that risk.

Depression is a killer, I suffered it severely 2 years ago. He doesn’t seem depressed, he’s happy between his outbursts, he just throws a complete tantrum when he wants to push the boundaries. Which brings everyone down at home.

what will be will be but right now you need to focus on your and your other kids! This isn’t good for any of you especially not your health! I wish you all the best❤
Thank you so much xx

Thank you admin for creating this board, I think there will be many families that are struggling.
 
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