parenting hell podcast : Most liked Posts

180922 said:

Do you not mean "for f*cks sake?!"

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Brilliant. What a twat I’ve made of myself

Troutpout said:

I honestly wish people would stop abbreviations. It’s getting ridiculous. I genuinely can’t work out some posts. Is it that hard to type out the full version? Ffs the phone does it for you pretty much

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Do you not mean "for f*cks sake?!"

I think our generation has made parenting too hard. Its become like a spectator sport. My mum didnt know how many activities other people's kids were doing, what their houses looked like, what everyone was eating for dinner, matching Christmas pyjamas, half term getaways etc. If you're a mum now there is a lot of noise out there about everything we could and should be doing. I think that's why the mental load feels too much at times.

CoraSP said:

What's an ES?
Partner of some sort I assume, but can't work out what ES stands for

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Thank you! It was driving me nuts

Google was no help

Marshallmum1982 said:

Really though- I don't get peoples issues with that? Just because we can't all afford to or don't want to do that means no one else should and we should look down on people who do? There's so much reverse snobbery goes on these days.

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I'm afraid I do judge people who have children and don't actually want to interact with them, as it makes a huge difference to their development as people. It's why most of the politicians in the country are absolute sociopaths, because they were abandoned at 7 to people who had to be paid to look after them.

I'm going to sound a bit like a knob I know, but I'm sure most of us want to raise children as empathetic people who contribute to their community and try to make life a bit better for everyone. I don't really want my children to be "all about the graft" stepping on people to get ahead in life. I think that's an awful attitude to have towards others.

Off my soapbox now sorry!!

There is one side of my brain that thinks this: That no matter who you are and what your set up,if you love and care for your kids and are present and engaged in their lives, then there are certain parts of parenting that are hard, draining, tiring etc. That all experiences are worth sharing.

However, there is the side of my brain that sees things like the phrase 'rare escape' being used in The Times review that make me want to smack my head against the wall. 'RARE' escape? We see Lou regularly go on trips with her friends (Rob reference Lou booking trips to offset his time away), have theatre days etc. And fair play - I wish all parents could do the same and it shouldn't be seen as a bad thing to do. But acting like an interview with The Times is a 'rare' day off.

It's the dis-ingenuity of it all that I find difficult.

I think it's a bit sly to claim to be the 'default' parent (default to me meaning something that is assumed or automatic) if it was a choice you actively made so that your husband could go out and bring in a lot of money - and it's a choice you continue to make. I completely get people feeling frustrated that it's often mums that the school calls when something's wrong or mums who have to book the dentist etc - but of course that's going to be the case when your husband is on tour in Australia. And it's not the fifties, the fact that Rob earns a wedge doesn't mean he gets to handover all childcare and house management to Lou but it doesn't seem like he does? How many times have we heard things like "Lou's going to see Beyonce in Amsterdam because I've been away so much". It seems as fair as it could be given their lifestyle.

I'm not saying that even things we choose can't be uncomfortable and challenging at times, but nothing happens in a vacuum and they've made the choice for Lou to be the 'default' parent with a lot more options and resources available to them that other people have.

Also, if you're such an awkward and shy 'what am i like' wallflower then don't go on tv - again, you chose to go on! So just put your big girl pants on and do it.

grahamzxy said:

Rob is more than too much at times - Josh is very easy to listen to, Rob seems pretty useless at calming Josh when he appears anxious, Rob is more interested about stressing him out even more.

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Have to disagree with this. He does sometimes wind him up but when josh was really going through the shit last year, rob was great at trying to help him understand anxiety and how he was taking on too much. They were really good eps actually.

youdontevenknowme said:

I have to start by saying I love this pod, it’s my favourite one by far. But I’m starting to get a bit aggravated by how often they both complain about being so busy and stressed and tired, as though this is caused by something completely out of their control. They’re busy and stressed because they’re greedy and say yes to every single opportunity that comes their way, and are making millions of pounds per year because of this. They could easily scale this back probably by half, and still do the pod, a couple of tv shows, a couple of live shows, and still make a fortune.

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I don't think it's necessarily greed. I think there's probably an element of "this could all end tomorrow" and wanting to make sure they've got themselves and their kids some security in life.

Rob made an excellent point once on the podcast saying that he doesn’t know one adult emotionally scarred from being lied to about Santa. Only people who were told Santa isn’t real seem to be disappointed that they missed out. Why rob your children of the magic, it’s such a wonderful time.

i was always the default parent for quite a few years. Very different lifestyle from the Becketts. For instance we didn't have the means to pay for anyone to collect from school and do their tea etc, we didn't have any supportive family around, we didn't have the cushion of wealth, we didn't have several 5-star holidays a year and weekends away with girlfriends. We just lived a very quiet life surviving on not a huge amount of a money.

Sorry if that sounds sour - i don't' mean to be or to put Lou down. I just don't know if some women realise what a position of privilege they speak from.

Incywincy said:

Just opened Instagram to yet another video of them talking about how much they shag

Pleeeeease can someone make them a thread.

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I thought you meant Rob / Josh there and I was wondering which of them had posted to their public Instagram and what I'd missed

disneys said:

What did he say???

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He was recounting his tale of a cloned plate, and someone shouted ‘heard it on the podcast’ and so he goes something like, ‘well I’ll tell it again, without Rob Beckett interrupting me’…. And I must say, I think the reaction was much louder than he expected

Ahh I still love the pod! I think the opinions on here are quite harsh at times. Yes they’re in a privileged position with their careers being high paid and flexible but they’re still allowed to be tired and find things hard. Who wants to listen to a podcast of Joe bloggs working a 9-5 and struggling to juggle paying their mortgage, nursery fees and maybe getting to go on the odd holiday. I live that every day I don’t want to hear about it twice a week on a podcast

I think if Rob doesn’t want them known then we should respect that and not post. Once on the internet it’s there forever and you never know what weirdos are reading! Not denying I was curious to know the names too, me and my friend have chatted about it, the same way if I see a baby in a Tesco and got chatting to the parent I would naturally ask baby’s name. If there’s a way to delete it I think we should.

Really enjoyed roses episodes, I love the Tuesday episodes and have found myself only listening to the intros of the guest episodes and then skipping a lot of the interviews. Can’t stand listening to someone promote their book or talk about their career when it’s a parenting podcast!

Exactly! She’s bastardised the term. It only works when you’ve got a job, too. Or if when the dad is home he does fuck all. Like mum A and dad B both work 9-5 but somehow it falls to A to organise their child’s birthday party, book in their eye appointments and manage everyone’s dentist visits including B’s. That’s where the term default parent has come in, when it defaults to (usually) the mum, despite her having the same outside commitments as the dad but ending up doing all the parenting and cooking and cleaning.

In Rob and Lou’s case, she’s a stay at home mum with a multi-millionaire husband, who also very much pulls his weight when he’s there, and waves her off happily to go on girls trips and whatever she wants while he looks after the kids. Then they have paid help and family help on top. It’s not what being the default parent means, they’ve taken it way out of context.

Is anyone else suspecting that using a buzzy insta-word is just a ruse for Lou to talk about what fabulous things they all do and how great she is at booking holidays? There’s a smugness about her and it’s rubbing off on Rob, too. They don’t seem to understand that everyone else would feel like they were doing a great job at parenting, too, if they had endless pots of money and the time and space to do it in.

Troutpout said:

Jesus Christ. He is so bloody wet. And stop using A & E as a fucking doctors surgery. Bellend.

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I think this is a bit harsh considering he needed to go on a nebuliser and his son had a temp of 41c!

If my husband worked until very late and night and earnt enough money to mean I didn't need to work, lived in a big house, went on multiple nice trips and 5-star holidays a year and basically gave our children an amazing life ... I don't think i would moan about the school run. I have always got the children ready in the morning - and i am not living a 5-star lifestyle . Its just called life. Give your head a wobble Lou its all a bit cringe.

I actually found Rob incredibly relatable in this ep. So much so that I found myself on the verge of tears. I am officially undiagnosed but very much ADHD/Autistic.

I struggle so much over New Year and into the first week of January. I am as low as you can be without being suicidal. It's horrendous and I genuinely felt like I was the only person to feel like this. I dread New Year (I am Mrs Christmas!) and the first week of January. The rest of January isn't a laugh but feels more doable.

So to hear Rob lay out bare the way I feel and to know that this isn't anything that can be fixed or made better by having an easy life, time off work or nice holidays, it made me feel understood. The way he said that he just has to acknowledge it and accept it and get through it, not try to "fix" it - that is what I need to do instead of becoming overwhelmed with sadness and gloom.

I'm not rich like Rob, can't actually afford holidays, but I do have a stable life that I love. So I can't understand why I still get so down for that period of time.

So yeah, this is the most relatable Rob has been for a while and it really has helped me to know it's not a "me" thing.

Is it not best to just ignore the name thing? Rob doesn’t want it out there. Very weird to keep going on about it x

Josh seems so much calmer and happier since his move to Devon. I think they made a good decision to relocate, sounds like it’s all working out nicely for them.
Also, imagine opening your door to carol singers and one of them is Josh Widdicombe off the telly!!!!